Advice From A Random Stranger
One thing I’ve noticed is that when things go wrong in love, the first reaction is to do a lot of man bashing. Man-bashing is a toxic habit to get into. It gives you the role of victim, and the entire male population the role of bad guy, which leaves you out-numbered, and your own worst enemy. It wreaks of bitterness and gives the impression that you are carrying around a lot of baggage- 2 qualities men try to avoid at all costs. Even during casual banter with a friend, you can be doing yourself a big disservice.
The cute guy at the next table will go back to enjoying his latte instead of asking you out because without even talking to you, he has learned that you already think he is scum. The guy you have been flirting with on FB will suddenly disappear following your latest status: Tired of boy drama, thinking of becoming a nun. Without even realizing it, you can start alienating yourself from the opposite sex. It can become second nature to resort to man-bashing, and you might find yourself ordering the salmon on a first date exclaiming “Wow, my ex was such a dead beat, he never took me to a nice place like this before!” Thinking you’re giving him kudos for the great restaurant choice, what you’re actually giving him is a good case of TMI that is a total turnoff.
1. They’re Good Company
-Men don’t feel the need to talk for hours about their life crises or obsess in front of the mirror about how fat they are. They just go out and have fun. The best part of hanging out with a guy friend is that you don’t have to reassure him 20 times that he looks like a natural blond, doesn’t look fat in those pants, and the girl that never called back has probably just lost her phone in a skydiving .
2. They Don’t Hold Grudges
– Guys can be throwing punches at each other, and an hour later they’re throwing back drinks. Look at some girls sideways and you suddenly find you’ve been de-friended on facebook.
3. They’re More In Touch With Their Emotions Than You Might Think
– I’ve observed my guy friends in their natural environment. I’ve witnessed them talking openly about what they want in a girl or relationship, and even problems they’re having finding love. You have to be in the right place at the right time to witness one of these elusive conversations (usually with the aid of a little liquid courage and a little encouraging of the conversation by me). Men do have/talk about feelings, they just don’t do it as often as women, which can be really refreshing.
4. They Open Things and Screw in Things
– Doors, jars of pickles, shelving units from Sweden.
5. They Don’t Ditch Their Friends Completely or Change Their Personality Every Time They Date Someone
-For the most part, guys have a good sense of self. They won’t abandon the people or activities they love when a new person comes along.